firsts

hello. i have talked to several different people over the last couple of weeks about the idea of entropy.

en·tro·py

ˈentrəpē/

noun

noun: entropy; plural noun: entropies; symbol: S

1. 1.

   PHYSICS

   a thermodynamic quantity representing the unavailability of a system's thermal energy for conversion into mechanical work, often interpreted as the degree of disorder or randomness in the system.
2. 2.

   lack of order or predictability; gradual decline into disorder.

   
   

   "a marketplace where entropy reigns supreme"

more specifically in terms of artistic practice and how if you stop making it becomes much harder to keep making. it's a physics law, right? things in motion stay in motion. when people ask me why i'm always doing so many things, this has become my default answer. if i'm in motion then more opportunities and more things that i'm interested in doing come my way. i started thinking about how this blog has languished. and how i miss writing and processing my thoughts this way. i partially blame instagram. it's much easier to post a little ditty over there on a daily basis. it's much harder to write a blog post that doesn't seem... well.... dumb or self promotional. i realized too, i feel bad posting when i no longer read blogs the way i used to. who has the freaking time? 



but then i started thinking. well if no one is here [except for maybe my dad. hi dad], shouldn't i feel more free to write whatever the hell i want about whatever the hell i want. theoretically YES. i kept putting off writing here because OH i should write about this show, or this experience, or this trip. and then when i didn't get to it. OH... well now it's too long ago, or who cares anyway, or what really do i want to say. the inactivity then becomes the norm. and it's all downhill from there, right ? [and not in the good kind of down hill].  these conversations also got me thinking about the idea of FIRSTS. we are a culture obsessed with firsts. in every way. we are successful if we are first. [or bold like a pioneer]. we like being first in line. 



we see firsts as milestones: first time.... you hold hands, your crush likes you back, kiss, your baby smiles/walks/says mama, on an airplane, travel outside of the country, eat some kind of food, drink alcohol, wear a bra/high heels/lipstick, you loose a friend, get a job, hate your job, have surgery, ride a scary roller coaster [above my kid, now 48" can ride more of the real deal thrill rides], you see a white hair on your head, feel old, cry over a book, someone close to you dies, get a dog, write a book, teach a class, become friends with a former student....

artistic practice has its own list: first time... you make something you really like, you like something you make for more than 2 months,  make a really big painting, make a series of paintings/works that has more than 10 things in it,  you try a new media, you have a show, you have a solo show, you make a giant installation that only existed in your mind until you PUT IT UP, you sell something, you give a lecture about your work, you find an art soulmate, something gets broken/stolen, you ask for help, hire help, show in a museum, sell to a museum, travel for you work, give up something for your work, destroy a work, give a work away, trade work, make only one of something, make 1000 of something, read something someone wrote about your work, see your book on SFMOMA's bookshelf [above is actually the 2nd time, but it actually kind of felt the same], you write an artist statement that really isn't 1/2 bad, you fill a sketchbook, you find someone copying your work, you find someone else copying your work and you kind of don't care....

 

yesterday i had my first show at a UTILITY [water to be specific] - EBMUD. who knew that they had exhibitions? not i. but i was glad to be asked to put some work up. it's a crazy mix of random things i had around the studio. for me it's really interesting to see all these different bodies of work shoved into the same room. how does my work actually function as a timeline? what are the similarities or the "threads" that ties the work together [besides actual use of thread].  the opening was yesterday and it was really fun. engineers and conservationists ask astute questions and were generally just interested in what i made and why i made it. there were several conversations about the parallels of art making to engineering - aka problem solving. there were several surprised looks when i talked about the seriousness and extent of the research that i [and most artists] conduct. all in all a good time. i'm teaching drawing one this semester to mostly non-art majors and it seems the lesson of this season is that sometimes non-art people ask the better questions. ok. maybe not better, but more sincere? and sometimes the more open question. in their quest for understanding something that isn't familiar they drop the pretense of needing to be cool, or thinking that they already know something to actually get to the place of really KNOWING SOMETHING. this isn't a novel concept, it's just interesting that it's getting hammered home for me right now. 

anyway, the show is up through the first week of may, and i'll be giving a lunchtime talk/walk through of the work on may 2nd. if you'd like to hear more about my overall process, or maybe you have some questions of your own, come down if you are free and ask em ! EBMUD is open to the public monday - friday 8am-4:30pm and is located at 375 11th street. all the art is on the 2nd floor lobby of the building. [and then you can go have some dim sum in china town].  hopefully i'll be back here sooner rather than later....